"I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that," the amazing Pippi Longstocking once said in the TV series of the same name. It’s a quote that, back in my past life as a teacher, I printed out in huge letters and hung right next to my blackboard. I truly wanted my eight-year-old students to never just assume they couldn't do something. A growth mindset versus a static mindset, as they call it in psychology. If you assume you can do it, you are much more likely to try, learn, and grow, rather than deciding beforehand that it’s too difficult and not even trying at all.
The only thing is: what I wanted to teach my students was something I was never particularly good at myself. I often thought others could do or know things better, "because they studied for it, or they have more experience, or...". Looking back, I think it was a general lack of self-confidence (and self-love?), which was only reinforced by my own behavior. If you never try anything and never experience success, it’s hard to build self-confidence. Fortunately, life sometimes forces our hand, and I can be truly grateful for that!
Almost six years ago, in November 2020, I started living on my own again for the first time in many years. I needed everything all over again: furniture, cutlery, plates, bedding, and... curtains! I decided to do the only thing I felt confident about, which was having drapes custom-made. They cost me a serious amount of money back then, but I could reasonably afford it and saw no other way out. Now, those curtains were amazing (with a floral pattern! Literally everyone thought they were hideous, but for years, they absolutely made my day, every single day!). However, last year they couldn't move with me to my new apartment at all. New windows, new measurements, new curtains. This time—having been out of work for years and living on government benefits—there was absolutely no budget for new curtains. So, I went to IKEA and bought drapes there. I took them to a tailor, who shortened them for 5 euros per meter. A total bargain compared to other tailors! Except... I got them back completely crooked. The left side of my curtains is 3 centimeters shorter than the right side... Afterwards, I read nothing but terrible reviews online, stating that customers got yelled at when they went to complain. So, I decided to just hang them up and learn to live with it (and I still do. There are worse things in the world, I suppose).
Meanwhile, a need slowly started growing inside me to buy sheer net curtains. You know, the kind of curtains that stay closed all day, allowing you to look outside while letting the light in, but keeping out the prying eyes of neighbors. I decided to look online... and found prices ranging between 380 euros (for custom-made curtains from the same website as six years ago) and 120 euros (at DIY stores, including having them shortened by the crooked-but-cheap tailor). Even though I am absolutely not a fan of IKEA, I gave in anyway because their price-quality ratio was simply the best. 39 euros for six meters of curtains is a great deal! But then came the big question: should I shorten them myself, or should I let the tailor do it?
The answer that came from deep within me was instantly clear: "No way you can shorten curtains!" And I believed it. I really can't do something like that. Delicate, small embroidery? Yes. Crocheting simple scarves? Yes. But shortening two curtains that are each three meters wide? No way. So, I went to the tailor to see what it would cost. Long story short: it was out of my budget. I still considered it, until I started praying about it seriously and suddenly Pippi's quote popped into my head: "I have never tried that before, so I think I should definitely be able to do that." Now, that Pippi character has a lot more courage than me... Am I even a Pippi? Can I even be a Pippi? HELL YEAH! Of course I can be a Pippi!
And suddenly, from the absolute depths of my being, I felt an incredible confidence and strength well up, telling me that I would 100% successfully finish shortening my curtains. "She believed she could, so she did," is another famous quote that suddenly flashed through my mind. Of course I can do this! "If other people can do it, why shouldn't you be able to?!"—which happens to be a classic saying of my own mom. And in the absolute worst-case scenario, they will end up just as crooked as the crooked tailor would have made them, but at least I’ll have saved the 24 euros the tailor was asking for them, and I can be proud that I gave it a try. And so, I did!
After measuring everything out, I just went for it. And when I finished marking the hemline and realized it lined up exactly where I wanted it to on the other side of the curtain, I felt this strange kind of spiritual fulfillment. What an amazing feeling that was! It was a mix of God’s Spirit inside me, a deep sense of pride, and a growing self-worth, self-love, and self-confidence. I kid you not: this was more spiritually fulfilling than any religious activity I have ever done. It was truly bizarre, and grand, and pure God-in-me. It was such a beautiful experience.
In the end, I worked on my curtains for hours—a day and a half, even—and I genuinely enjoyed every minute of it. Afterwards, tired but deeply satisfied and proud, I was able to hang up my self-shortened curtains. And suddenly, those curtains are so much more than just curtains. Suddenly, they tell a story. Pippi's story: nobody gets to tell me what I can or cannot do, not even my own insecurities and fears. There is a voice, a Power inside me that is greater, and That voice speaks the truth. And the truth is that I am capable of so much more than I ever could have imagined.
To be completely honest: if I had been wealthier, I would have just taken the curtains to a proper tailor. But what would have been fulfilling about that? At moments like these, I am genuinely grateful that I live on benefits and have to be so intentional with money. I’ve experienced that exact same joy in the past when I successfully patched my own bicycle tire, and when I started cutting my own hair. Sometimes God forces us past what we think we can handle, but He will never give us something we can't. This time, it was about little things like curtains, bicycle tires, and a head of hair. But I think that’s how it works with everything. He believes in us more than we believe in ourselves, and thank goodness for that!
Maybe I should follow Pippi's example more often. And just maybe, I can do what I used to do for my students: print out the quote and hang it somewhere visible as a constant reminder. Don't you think?
